Toon Site

[Blue]

A buddy and I started a site a while back and we're kinda new to the online comics world, but I would absolutely love it (and be in great debt of) if you all would go over and give it a look-see and let me know what you think. The toon I write/draw is Planet 3 - it has some gaming element to it, but it really evolved into something totally left field, so I'm not even sure how to catagorize it. The other comic on the site, Metro, my buddy draws, I write. Planet is updated Mon and Thur - so that's an ongoing thing, Metro (as it's a full-length feature) is every other month.

Anyhow, the website is www.laughingjak.com . I respect all of your opinions here and wanted to get some honest feedback, maybe too hope it's something ya'll would come back to.

[Evil Avatar]

It certainly is a great site. Who did your site programming? Me and Everlost could sure use your help with our comic book when we get it started.

Great job. Thanks for sharing it with us.

[Evil Avatar]

Thread moved to News Items so everyone can check it out.

[Blue]

It certainly is a great site. Who did your site programming? Me and Everlost could sure use your help with our comic book when we get it started.

Great job. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Actually, my friend Joe (who I run the site with) did all of the programming. I drew some of the pictures/animations and whanot - as did he - but all of the code and that fancy behind the scenes business is all him. Self-taught too, no less. I know he'd be all over it if you ever needed any help.

Thanks for the kind words too, Evil.

[Kagger]

Is it a continuing story, Blue?

[Kefkataran]

Very cool site design. I'll be giving this a good check-out in due time.

[Blue]

Is it a continuing story, Blue?

Metro is, and Planet kinda is. I mean, there's a definite story-line and a history to it (I reference past strips and such), but it's broken down into archs. Like now, we're disgusied (I think I spelled that wrong) as Girl Scouts so that we can raise enough money to build a Danger Room. It's kind of a hybrid comic, if anything - a wish list of what I would like my life to be.

In October, I'm starting another comic (an actual comic, not just a strip) set in the Planet world that will flesh out things more, tell history, backstories, additional characters, all of that good stuff. Those will more or less weave in and out of the P3 stories that are put up Monday and Thursday.

And, to Kefk: danke.

[Kefkataran]

but it's broken down into archs

Called story arcs traditionally. :) Just thought I should let you know. ;)

[Blue]

Called story arcs traditionally. :) Just thought I should let you know. ;)

I have now decided to use the word "arcs" as a substitute for the previously used word "archs" per my own lengthy soul searching.

Second site note: danke again Kefk.

[Derwin]

Evil, you are planning a comic book? Check out my website in the sig, I do a lot of really good comic book work myself. On the topic though: I think the site is pretty cool, snazzy design.

[resikel]

The one criticism I have is that the site was designed for 800x600 fixed viewing. If that's your expected target audience, then fine. But I'm thinking going to 1024x768 is a safe bet. Heck, take a poll here and get some feedback as to resolution preferences.

Your strip is approximately 501x647. Just by going one up on the resolution will eliminate the required "nudge-length" scrolling, which can become annoying to the viewer. If you're showcasing your work, a good navigation/design will enhance the viewer's experience.

And the choice to go Flash is a little odd. I have mixed feelings on this. At one end, your site benefits with the Flash navigation pulldown, loading, etc. But then it doesn't have the "expected Flash" content that I take for granted from other Flash-enriched site. Your site feels under-flashed if that makes sense(?)

Delineating the identities more, ie. Laughing Jak, Planet 3, and Metro is recommended, ex. through additional splash screen or credits.

--------------------------------------

As for Planet 3, a little background/character info would help with the strip.
Clicking on the Planet 3 side navigation brought me to a splash page with three options: 1) Strips 2) Achives 3) Coming Soon. Even though there's nothing in the Coming Soon link, adding a splash page would be appropriate.

Also consider adding a numbering system/title addition on top of your strip (I know the title and date shows up during the loading time) as to give the viewer a sense of progression as they read thru your strip.

--------------------------------------

Metro - the background is disruptive (the one that you see everytime you click the next arrow). And you can see part of the background image because it's horizontal while the comic is vertical. This has the portential to fight for the viewer's peripheral sight. Keep the background neutral as to not conflict or detract from what you're trying to showcase.

Metro is approximately 553x836, so there will still be a scroll bar if you two decide to go to 1024x768. Tough decision there. Oddly, Metro has a progression indicator, ex. Metro Issue 2, Page 1, while yours don't.

--------------------------------------

The decision to format the Forum in Flash is another odd choice. Some texts are hard to read, and there's nothing in the forum that dictates that Flash needs to be used.

--------------------------------------

Umm...I guess that's not one criticism. But these are just my first impression of your site. I've only skim through it; I haven't read the comics so I can't comment on it.

Lastly, consider doing a "Making Of" or "How To" type page about your art. I've seen that on some comic sites and it helps with the traffic on the forums and site in general (But then that might strain your time if you do not have the time to put in maintaining the content). People are interested in the process of art making. I am.

--------------------------------------

So, I too am making an episodic graphic novel. After a couple of chapters (enough to get a feel for the novel), I'll put it for criticism and what not. Of course, that could be a while.

[Evil Avatar]

Evil, you are planning a comic book? Check out my website in the sig, I do a lot of really good comic book work myself. On the topic though: I think the site is pretty cool, snazzy design.

Yes, me and Everlost_MI are looking into making a .pdf comic book with a military theme. It never occured to me to do a nice flash presentation like Blue has done. It certainly is food for thought.

I have visited your website in the past, it is pretty cool. I like the robot art. There seems to be a link missing from the links page, though. ;)

Blue - I agree with a lot of reskiel's comments. I use 1280x1024 resolution (in fact, Evil Avatar.com is optimized for that resolution...) and I think you could certainly benefit from bumping it up from 800x600 to 1024x768. I think that is the standard resolution these days. I really agree about Metro's background. That "strip in the background of the strip" is really weird.

[Azrikam]

Full Disclosure: I loathe Flash sites.

As for the Planet 3 comic, most of the strips were very confusing. Even when I read them in order, it didn't make much sense to me. I didn't find them funny either. Sorry I don't have any constructive criticism. If I knew how to make a funny webcomic, I'd probably do one of my own.

[Blue]

First off, thanks to all so far who have at least given the site a look-over and left feedback. There was nothing more frustrating for me when in college I'd get a paper back from one of those "student reading days" (you know, the ones where the rest of the class would read your stuff) and it would say "I like this." or "Not my style." So you have no idea how much I appreciate your thought out remarks, so for that: thank you.

I will absolutely look into the moving of the resolution setting but I'll be honest in saying I'm somewhat computer inept in that way. I'm a totally right-brained person so anything dealing with number and my face starts to ooze. However, I'll bring it up to Joe (as he's more the man with the mad finger skills......ahem) and try and get that ball rolling. That could be why the site looks a bit off on my mac but fine on my PC, heh.

Resikel: I've actually been heavily considering doing a character bio page for P3 for some time now, so I think after reading over what you said, that may have sealed the deal. That type of crap is fun for me anyhow and if ya'll think it would benefit people that might hit the site, I'm all for it. And were you saying you think the title should also be on the page itself above the comic (or thereabouts) in addition to the loading screen? Just clarifying as I think that's a good idea.

And under flashed, I like that lol. Makes full-sense. In the future (actually, I'm working on it now), I would like to do an animated toon also (not Planet, something else) and I think the site set-up would suit that perfectly but yeah, as of now a lot of the flash - for me anyhow - is fun as opposed to be a necessity, if that makes sense. I think the Jak that pops out in the bottom left hand corner is more cute than anything, heh.

And for Azrikam: finding the strips confusing, even in order, is still constructive criticism. They make sense to me, but I'm the writer, so they almost have to. So - thanks for that. It's good getting an outsider's thoughts as that helps me look at it more critically.

Again, thanks everyone so far for your comments/concerns/etc. S'really helping and greatly appreciated.

[LaughingJak]

I figured I'd drop in with my two cents.... I'm Joe, the designer and artist / co-author on Metro. The most logical complaint to me is the optimization of size, and you're COMPLETELY right. A couple years ago when I started to learn flash, some little birdie on my shoulder that 800x600 would be a good way to go. Rebuilding the site for a new resolution would probaby take some serious long months, since Flash doesn't contain the 'resizing' abilities of HTML. (at least not that i know of - if anyone wants to chime in here....) And I'm not the type of guy that'll sit and argue criticism, but I just thought you guys might like some perspective on the 'under flashing' of the site: Flash is a really powerful tool, and there are some people like Azrikam who loathe Flash sites. I think the reason for this is that designers have spent so much time trying to find IN YOUR FACE ACTION!! with flash, that they've begun to send their viewers into seizures whenever you visit a page. Current movie pages drive me crazy, when it loads and suddenly there's 20 sounds on every button and the screen is constantly changing whenever you move your mouse. Jak is supposed to be a relaxing playground for people (games coming soon) so the 'under flashing' is very intentional. A few interesting movements here and there to take you from one 'world' to another, and let you sit there and listen to whatever was coming through your mp3 player, as opposed to some techno loop track. : D

Thank you all so much for your critiques, It's really nice to be able to look at a board and not just hear, "your site sucks!" and "i love your site baby! whoo!" As much of a boost as that may be - it leaves me with no idea where anyone's been and who's reading what! I'm seriously considering in a couple months bumping up the size of the site, thanks again for all your help guys!

EDIT: And yes... this is my first Evil Avatar post since Blue's introduced me to the site, but i doubt it'll be my last!

[JazGalaxy]

Hey, Jack.

You're art is good and you have talent. I very much reccomend that you check out some anatomy books. Specifically Anatomy For The Artist by Robert Beverly Hale. It's helped me emmensely and I think you might find it interesting.

[resikel]

After thinking it over a bit (and getting some sleep), I have some additions:

--------------------------------------

800x(vertical) can work for you if your core audience requires that screen width resolution. ex. VG Cats (http://www.vgcats.com/). Something for you to consider when you make the size change.

Also, check this site out, Second Story Interactive (http://www.secondstory.com/). They made their Flash fit to screen and resizable with the browser. My Flash skill is not uber enough to figure that out so I can't help there.

--------------------------------------

Part of my distain for your use of Flash is this: I can't use my scroll wheel -- a basic function. As a viewer, this one extra effort, having to use Flash's nav bar constantly detracts from my experience. It's not noticable if it wasn't for the amount of scrolling that I had to do. This will probably be a non-issue when you decide to make the size change.

And oh, personal preference-wised, a Flash based content with a HTML styled forum would be my choice.

--------------------------------------

A little clarification on the "Delineating the identities more" subject. You have two different properties (through drawing styles and thematics and creators) but yet, it is housed under one design that is suited more for Planet 3 than Metro. My impression is that the website design does not have enough visual ques for me to know that there's two separate intellectual properties. Joe needs his credit, too. :p

Just imagine Evil Avatar and say, Blue's News housed under one address. How will you design for that? That's the situation you two are in; one of you is Evil while the other one is Blue. You need a design that gives each other individuality while being incorporated into a main theme, ie. LaughingJak.

--------------------------------------

Originally Posted by Blue
There was nothing more frustrating for me when in college I'd get a paper back from one of those "student reading days" (you know, the ones where the rest of the class would read your stuff) and it would say "I like this." or "Not my style."

Blue, I feel you. When we had our weekly painting critiques back in my college years, the girls would say something like, "I like it" and I would look at them and think, "If you are going to suck up to me, give me head instead." When the guys would say the same thing, I thought, "Idiot." I'm such a whore. :D

Edit: BTW, I'm not putting anyone here down for their opinion. I've learned a little bit about critiquing back in my days and it's just asinine of me were I to assume that everyone had the same teachings or whatnot. I'm just making fun of my collegemates whom should know better.